Semi Truths A highly irregular weblog dedicated to Truth, Justice, and American Cheese…!

TRUE: According to a report in London’s The Daily Telegraph, a combination of stress and metabolic changes brought about by serving in the high altitudes of the disputed Kashmir mountain region is causing some Indian soldiers to suffer impotency when they return home to their wives. The article quotes Martin Wilkins, a London pharmacologist, who explains that the “extreme alpine environment” causes the body to create the enzyme phosphodiesterase, which hampers the ability of the lungs to absorb oxygen and restricts blood flow, “causing it to droop”.

A handful of soldiers have gone so far as to receive penile implants, a procedure that involves sewing an inflatable bladder and a small pipe inside the patient’s scrotal sac. An Indian army urologist acknowledges that it has been difficult getting the proud, battle-hardened veterans to even admit that they are underperforming in the bedroom.

SEMITRUE: Colonel Lloyd Gibbon-Fravisham, retired from the British Army after serving several years in India before that nation’s independence in 1947, is quoted as saying “that never would have happened when we were in charge”. Speaking from his residence in Leeds, he added “those soldiers wouldn’t be having this problem now if only they could have carried on the British Army tradition of always keeping a stiff upper lip”.

reference:

Indian army finds inflatable answer to low morale, The Daily Telegraph Online, May 05 2002.

TRUE: In a major foreign policy speech, “President” Bush declares his support for a democratic Palestinian state and calls for the Palestinian people “to elect new leaders… not compromised by terror”. Palestinian officials, expecting a call for an Israeli withdrawal and hearing instead about “Israel’s need to defend itself”, react with alarm and dismay. Critics of the administration wonder how Bush can call on the Palestinian people to “practice democracy” while, in the same breath, declare an intention only to recognize “a new and different Palestinian leadership”.

SEMITRUE: Press Secretary Ari Fleischer, addressing these criticisms, points out that “this White House is no stranger to controversial changes in management” and, citing bullet-proof polling results, declares that “our current administration approval ratings demonstrate that a popular leader need not necessarily be, you know, like actually elected…”