Semi Truths A highly irregular weblog dedicated to Truth, Justice, and American Cheese…!

April 15, 2007

How To Lose a Customer

Filed under: Charlottesville,Virginia — semi @ 2:13 pm

I was an nTelos customer since before there even was an nTelos, back when they were still CFS. They were my first cell phone provider before cell phones were common. They’ve never had the greatest service, but they have been reliable enough in my area, and they give a 10% discount to UVA employees, so I stuck around. This weekend, however, nTelos lost me as a customer, and all due to a policy that strikes me as irredeemably stupid.

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March 24, 2007

The Headmaster of British Rock Returns!

Filed under: Music — semi @ 6:48 am

Nick Lowe

I am very jazzed about this! I’ve been a Nick Lowe fan for decades, and drove several hours to see him in a live concert just a few years ago. Now he is releasing a new album. If you’re not very familiar with Nick Lowe and his long career, you should start with Basher, a decent compilation CD; if you’re already a fan, go straight for The Doings, his career-spanning boxed set.

For a picture of me and Nick Lowe, and more information about his new release, see more below.

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March 17, 2007

“SHUTDOWN THE INTERNET”

Filed under: Technology — semi @ 8:45 pm

Here’s a Cruel Tech Trick

Got clueless users? Reset their home page to TurnOffTheInternet.com and wait for the Help Desk calls!

“THE STUPIDEST THING I’VE EVER DONE TO MYSELF”

Filed under: WWW — semi @ 6:05 pm

I have been reading Cecil Adam’s Straight Dope column for more than twenty years. If you are familiar with his work, you know that he has managed to cop a pretty good living crafting informative and entertaining answers to his readers’ many arcane questions (and man, would I love to have his job!). StraightDope.com is definitely a Website Worth Watching.

In addition to a remarkable archive of Cecil’s writing, the website also hosts the Straight Dope Message Board, one of the livelier discussion forums you’re likely to encounter. My favorite is the MPSIMS (“Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share“) and a thread titled “The stupidest thing I’ve ever done to myself“. It began when a woman described punching herself in the nose while trying to put on her bra. After a few hasty inquiries from sensitive men who wanted to make sure that her breasts were all right, a long thread soon grew as more contributors described various self-inflicted bodily injuries. Something about this thread has inspired numerous tales, and there are now well over a hundred posts detailing all types of pratfalls, black eyes, blows to the skull and other precious body parts.

Personally, I have too many of my own tales to recount here , but the thread reminded me of a time that I faced my own mortality with razor-like reflexes and a hearty “nyuck-nyuck“, in an incident I can only call:

MY DEATH AS A STOOGE

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